This is one of the concepts I teach my students – are you part of the problem or part of the solution? You can be one or the other. If you’re not actively part of the solution, then your choice to be apathetic (or negative) is part of the problem.
Negative energy (when you feel small and/or cold inside) is always the easier choice. Apathy isn’t technically negative energy – you don’t feel small or cold inside, you just feel nothing. And when you feel nothing, when you feel inert, you have no momentum… you’re truly standing still in a universe that continues to move forward. So, standing still, being apathetic, not caring… it’s the same as going backwards, just slower. And your attitude becomes an obstacle for those of us that choose to move forward and be part of the solution. But apathy, like negativity, is an easier choice than being part of the solution.
To be part of the solution, you have to work – you have to gain an understanding of situations outside your regular life, you have to choose to ignore those that actively or inactively work against you with their apathetic or negative attitudes, and you have to risk failure on an almost daily basis as you work towards building something, fixing something or improving something. Plus, the more you do and create, the more the apathetic and negative will start to actively try to tear you down – kinda like crabs in a bucket. When you put crabs in a bucket, and one starts to crawl out, the others will pull it back down.
People with negative energy inside want you to feel the same – small and cold. To choose to feel warm and big, and still send out positive energy towards others with negative energy is not an easy life.
In Kung Fu, we talk about being able to ‘sik fu’, which means ‘eat bitterness.’ To be successful, to develop skill and ability through hard work over time (which is the meaning of ‘kung fu’)… you have to learn to live a different type of life – you do things that aren’t normal… you get up early, work late, work on the weekends, work in a any situation or location… whatever it takes to create success, you agree to that as a lifestyle.
So – are you actively working to make things better, or are you either apathetic (feeling mostly nothing) or actively negative (feeling small and cold inside)? If you aren’t working daily to feel warm and big inside, you’re part of the problem instead of part of the solution.
Economies rise and fall. Countries are born and die. The only thing we can ultimately control is our own thoughts, feelings, and actions. Are you trying to expand and help others to expand? Seth Godin has a great book, “Survival is not enough” which I suggest you get and read.
If you want to see an example of what I mean, come to O’Leary’s Pub & Grub in Centerville on a Tuesday night and meet Heather (H2) – she actively chooses to be positive with everyone she meets at the pub. I spoke with her about her attitude, and she said, “Sure, there’s days I don’t feel like being happy, but what does that accomplish? I prefer to be happy and give that to other people to brighten their days.” Having watched her work for the last few weeks, I can say that she definitely makes an impact on everyone at O’Leary’s. Does everyone notice her positive attitude? Of course not – in fact, a few people probably resent her being happy because they are cynical and negative. But I can point out her choice to be happy and share that with my students and she becomes a point of positive energy in the world.
As Thomas Merton said, “If you yourself are at peace, then there is at least some peace in the world.” If each of us works towards peace within ourselves, we actively become part of the solution to the problems of the world.
A friend of mind and I were talking about the recent Health Insurance Reform and I pointed out something and she replied, ‘that’s from the health insurance companies’ and then she pointed out something and I said ‘that’s from the unions’ – we both agreed that the problem is influence of special interests groups… but really, the special interests (unions or insurance companies, for example) are symptoms of human attitudes. Attitudes are what you think, feel, and do (all three at once, not just one). So the real problem is people and their concepts/mindsets/attitudes… so that’s where the fix has to occur – which is primarily why I enjoy working with children and families the most.
A friend of mine listens to talk radio and sometimes gets really excited. I remember one time he was going on about the abuse of ‘eminent domain’ in some other state. I asked him if he was going to form a political action committee, or get involved with one, to effect real change. He said no. So I said, ’Then shut up. You’re getting super excited and upset about something you feel is wrong but you’re not willing to do anything to fix it… so why waste your life? You’re just getting energetic about something that’s not going to change.” My point to him was that if he wasn’t going to do anything to fix things, you’re part of the problem – so doing nothing is the same as doing whatever it was he disagreed with.
Part of the solution, or part of the problem… it’s your choice.
I want to fix stuff and make it better – and in my world, better means: more freedom, more choice, and more opportunity… with the strength to live with the consequences of your decisions and actions.
Sincerely, Jeremy R., the Kung Fu Guy